Herein lies the lament of the lumberjack. Before witnessing his woeful wailings, discern his dismal downfall:
Skip a bit to about 3:45 for the tale of the lumberjack, or watch the lovely story about the pet parrot first (a very touching story about a man and his Norwegian Blue).
I’ll give you a few moments to digest.
All set? Lovely. Now you have seen the ignominious dashing of the lumberjack’s hopes and dreams against the cruel rocks of the Mounties.
I’m a lumberjack, but far from ok;
A lumberjack still, but not the same.
I had a good life, fulfilling and gay*
Until the day when the Mounties came.
The day was rare in its beauty and calm,
the Larch and Scots Pine standing majestic.
If only I had known what was to come,
I would not have cared for the aesthetic.
I burst into song, with joy in my heart,
For my best girl stood lovingly by me.
I was in my element, playing my part
Of the lumberjack that all expected to see.
The Mounties in red supported my song,
Repeating my boasts in lovely chorus.
I sang from my heart, and I sang strong,
For my love of my life and of the forest.
But as I sang my song, the tide did turn,
And all joy and happiness abandoned my soul.
The Mounties repeated my words with scorn,
Casting my heart into an abyssmal hole.
My best girl left, questioning my manhood,
While the Mounties laughed, laughed, laughed.
I saw their eyes through the dark of the woods,
And the judgement within them that I was daft.
The Mounties be damned, the bastard lot,
For destroying my life with their cruelty.
All that is left, which is all that I’ve got,
Is a lonely life of chopping down trees.
The only friends that remain are trees;
The Fir, the Redwood, the Maple and Pine.
Yet I no longer feel joy at what I must be,
As the duty of killing my only friends is mine.
*Happy, not the other one. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, of course. Well, maybe a little bit the other one too.
Yet another life destroyed by the cruelty of the Mounties. Spread the word. Be on your guard.
-Because I said so
(No offense intended to any Mounties, family of Mounties, Mountie fans/supporters, or lumberjacks.)