Calling Dr. Osbourne

I am a fan of Ozzy Osbourne, for the most part.  I believe that his work with Black Sabbath was crucial to the development of heavy metal as we know it today, and I would gladly list the Paranoid album as one of my top 25 favorite albums of all time.  I would gladly list Crazy Train as one of my top 25 favorite songs of all time.  Granted, he was not always perfect, but what he did right was essential.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CXko2YCuZa8

Ozzy is one hell of a musician.  Starting this summer, he will also be one hell of a health-advice columnist for the UK’s The Sunday Times magazine.

Wait, what?  Health-advice columnist?  Ozzy Osbourne?  I must have mixed two different post ideas by accident to create such an impossible combination!  No, my friends, this is the real deal.  Ozzy Osbourne has been offered, and has accepted, a position with The Sunday Times as their new health-advice columnist, starting late this summer.  His official comment:

When The Sunday Times magazine asked me to be its new health-advice columnist… I thought they were taking the p**s, to be honest with you.

But then I thought about it for a while, and it makes perfect sense – I’ve seen literally thousands of doctors over my lifetime, and spent well over £1 million on them, to the point where I sometimes think I know more about being a doctor than doctors do.

If people can learn from my stupid mistakes without having to repeat any of them, or if they can take some comfort from the crazy things my family has been through over the years… that’s more than enough for me.

When you put it that way, he has a point.

-[insert BUT WHERE DOES BITING THE HEAD OFF OF A LIVE BAT COME INTO THIS? here]

I'm the Ambassador of Kickyourassador. I am the Walrus. I'm on a highway to the Danger Zone. I am the Kwisatz Haderach. I do things with words that have a generally geeky gist.

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