Today, it was the unfortunate responsibility of Major Nelson to announce that Xbox LIVE would be increasing its price, effective November 1, 2010. Why is this responsibility so unfortunate for Major Nelson? Because of the Internet. Yes, Internet, I am looking squarely at you, and you know perfectly well why I am focused on your vile visage. The Internet is full of selfish assholes with unreasonable senses of entitlement, and they were out in full force when Major Nelson’s announcement hit.
The only affected prices are the ones listed in the chart. For example, in the U.S., the 12-month rate is increasing by $10, but the U.K. 12-month rate will remain unchanged.
For U.S. Xbox LIVE Gold members, the 12-month increase means that instead of paying $4.17/month for a clean, unified, smooth online and online multiplayer experience, they will be paying $5/month for a clean, unified, smooth online and online multiplayer experience. Surely that doesn’t seem so terrible, does it? $0.83 more per month over the course of a year for a system that does away with the chaos of private dedicated server online and online multiplayer? Surely the Internet will be fine with such a small increase!
Oh, but you fail to understand that the Internet shouldn’t even have to pay for Xbox LIVE in the first place! This clean, unified, smooth online and online multiplayer experience supported by Microsoft (not Micro$oft) should be provided as a free service to all players. The sheer audacity of Microsoft attempting to charge players for a useful service (which, by the way, Microsoft does incur some cost for operating) is staggering! I kid you not, I have seen people on the Internet threaten to sell their Xbox 360’s because of this price increase. That’s like all of the people who threatened to move to Canada if George W. Bush was re-elected. How many people said that? How many people ACTUALLY did it?
Yeah, fuck you Internet. Shut your damn dirty mouth.
-[insert RAAAAAAAAAAAAGE here]