Last night, as my wife and I were preparing to enter the sovereign realm of Morpheus, the anthropomorphic personification of dreams, I voiced a thought. I turned to her and said, “You know why Star Wars is definitively not science fiction? The time between the Old Republic era and the Trilogy era was what…3-6 thousand years? Why was there absolutely NO technological advancement in a period of at least three millenia? You see no progression or advancement over the course of those millenia in Star Wars. Star Trek shows you how species and cultures advance over the course of decades or centuries, while Star Wars can’t even be assed to update it by millenia!” My loving wife response to me, “Midichlorians are science,” with a troll’s glint in her eyes.
The repudiation of the fallacious belief that Star Wars is science fiction is not the point today, however. I merely tell that story so that you can share the frame of mind that I found myself and my darling wife in a scant 12 hours ago and how the topic of midichlorians, the bane of Star Wars, came up.
Let’s say that midichlorians are canon. “But Chris, they ARE canon.” You shut your damned whore mouth this instant. Let’s say that midichlorians are canon. An individual’s connection to the Force is a biological matter determined by the count of midichlorians in his or her blood. At the midichlorian comment, the light of my life, the apple of my eye, brought up a thread she had seen on the Star Wars: The Old Republic forums while working. Paraphrased, the thread commented that, if that truly was the case, “…there must be one hell of a black market selling Force sensitive users blood…”
If an individual’s sensitivity and connection to the Force is measured solely by the count of midichlorians in his or her blood, then this forumgoer is absolutely correct; the black market must exist, and it must be incredibly lucrative. Looking beyond that, however, my Sith-at-heart sugar dumpling took it to its next logical (for a megalomaniac) step…where was the unstoppable Sith Lord accumulating power by giving himself injections of midichlorian-rich blood?
“A Sith on steroids,” I remarked in response. “Where, indeed?”
Surely there would be at least one intrepid dark Force user who would have seen the raw power of shooting up and started a campaign of what would essentially amount to the harvesting of Force sensitive individuals to feed their habit?
Leave it to my beautifully dark-minded wife to reach that end.